olympic spa

So you're adventurous, you love a little pampering, you want smooth skin, you're on a budget and you like it a little spicy - your kimchee, that is. Oh, and you have a vadge (because, sorry boys, this is a peenie-free zone).

Where do you go?
Olympic Spa.

What to expect?
A low-key, clean, relaxing, pleasant, ethnic, bathhouse experience that will leave you wondering how soon you can come back and why it took you so long to get there in the first place. Lots of nekkie ladies of all shapes, sizes, colors, and ages. This place is strict on their no swimsuit policy, but there's no need to be shy since you certainly won't be alone, and let me tell ya, you have nothin' these ladies haven't seen a hundred times before (that week). Incidentally, let me remind you that waxing is a mostly western phenomenon, so if you're between appointments, don't let that stop you either. No one will notice. Or care.

What do you do?
Keep it simple and go for the Simple Soak for $15 - access to all of their pools, the Jade Steam Room, the Oriental Clay Sauna (like climbing into a big tandoor oven), and the Oxygen and Bichotan Charcoal Therapy Room (hot, hot, hot!) - and then give yourself a DIY Korean Akasuri scrub. Tip: Don't be shy. Ask the ladies at the front desk for a scrub kit for a few bucks and a little instruction. You'll be happy you did.

Splurge a little and make an appointment for one of their signature treatments - which all include Akasuri scrub, Shiatsu/Swedish massage, Simple Soak, and then some - like the Goddess ($130), Pure Bliss ($100), or Milk & Honey Body Smoothie ($100).

Call all of your friends to tell them about your rockin' new find.

How do you feel?
Damn good! And damn clean. A lot like a tenderized piece of meat with skin as smooooooth as a baby's bum. Ready for sweet sleep.

Tip: Have a little cash on you to tip the complementary valet in back and to grab yourself a little grub in the restaurant that doesn't take anything but. Try the fresh fruit juice. It's refreshing after doing the circuit. Do eat at the restaurant but wait until AFTER your services. Trust me! Trying to digest spicy food with two women pushing and pulling all your bits will NOT enhance your experience! And don't shriek when you ease into the ice pool (as I witnessed someone do). Take it like a (wo)man or the Korean ladies will shoosh and shame you! Plan to be here 3-4 hours to really enjoy the experience.

3915 W Olympic Blvd
Los Angeles, CA 90019
(323) 857-0666

al gelato

After our less than thrilling experience at BJ's, we decided to stop by our favorite gelato joint on the way home - Al Gelato. Everything is homemade and I've yet to have anything here I didn't love, but faves include the DEEP dish apple pie with caramel sauce and fresh whipped cream (it's still a mystery to me how you bake something that size and get it perfect), the lemon ice, riccota cheesecake, and, of course, the chocolate hazelnut gelato, which is hands down one of the best I've had anywhere. If you don't do dairy, the fruit flavor ices (pear, lemon, raspberry, apple, etc.) are delish and so is the chocolate ice (it's better than most chokkie ice creams). The staff is warm, friendly, helpful and always quick to offer you another sample :) Tonight we had the tiramisu for the first time, and it was damn good. Can't wait to try their deep dish pecan and pumpkin pies this fall. Mmmmm...

I hear they have wonderful grilled sandwiches but I never have room for anything more than dessert.

Tip: Even if it seems pricey, buy a quart of your fave flavor. It's so rich, it'll last for weeks - even for a chocoholic like Beer.

806 S Robertson Blvd
Los Angeles, CA 90035
(310) 659-8069

Photo courtesy of Joan S.

bj's restaurant & brewery

For starters, this place is called BJ's, so I'll do my best to refrain from the Beavis and Butthead jokes.

We ducked in today for lunch after snooping around at Secret Stash because Beer recalled having some sort of orgasmic dessert experience at another one of their locations. We were seated at one of the few tables upstairs, which was awkward but all that was available, and ordered the Avocado Egg Roll appetizer. Despite the sauce being too sweet (even for me) they were crispy and yummy (but then, I'm of the mind that you could deep fry a leather shoe and it would be good). They were a lot like the ones at Cheesecake Factory, but with the addition of bacon (I'm also of the mind that everything is better with bacon). Beer ordered the Roast Beef Dip and I had the BBQ Chicken Salad. After a long wait for the egg rolls, the main courses were up and our server rushed us through them so she could clear the plate and make room on the tiny table. He said the roast beef was bland and rubbery and the roll was soggy on the inside and over crisped on the outside. The battered fries and horseradish creme were much better, but not enough to salvage the meal. As for my salad, had there actually been any BBQ chicken in it, it might have been great. It was mostly chopped iceberg lettuce with a few kernels of corn, some black beans, jicama, tomatoes, and a few chunks of bland grilled chicken. Had they tossed half the lettuce, added more of the remaining ingredients and actually included some BBQ chicken, it would have been a worthy meal of a salad.

Food aside, we both had the Blonde brew which wasn't bad on a warm day if you're in the mood for a pale ale. Sadly, we were so bummed with our food and service, we passed on their signature Pizookie dessert (a giant deep dish baked cookie topped with ice cream). Beer didn't even want to finish his fries ... never a good sign.

For more than an appetizer and some suds, we would have been better off at Le Pain Quotidien or CPK - both next door. So would you.

939 Broxton Avenue
Los Angeles, CA 90024
(310) 209-7475

cobra lily

**Update ** It's official. My beloved Lily is closed. No mas. Evidently, they were going through a change of ownership, the deal hit a snag, fell through, and that was the end of that. To add insult to injury, some total shite looking deli/diner place seems to have moved in. No me gusta. (3/29/07)

Sister to Cobras & Matadors, this has always been one of my local favorites since I can walk here.. and then stagger home. You can enjoy most of Cobras' tapas (in addition to a great house special steak sandwich) without having to BYOB or travel to the east side location for a little sangria with your meal.

It's a dim, small, sexy, chandelier lit space with funky art on the walls. Right on the corner adjacent the Larry Flynt building, Cobra has a great little bar, friendly bartender, a couple of very pleasant and competent waitresses, and a few small tables, including two rounds, which can be thrown together for larger groups.

Some of my faves here include the fried lentils, the cheese plate and sangria. If you just want to stop in for a drink, they have a full bar and you can snack on delicious olives while you enjoy your libation.

This is a great, low-key, weeknight place to grab a light dinner and they've always got an impressive soundtrack ala kcrw buzzing in the background to help you unwind and set the vibe.

Note: The Lily has been closed the last two weeks for a little sprucing up, so I'm curious to see what changes, if any, have been made when they reopen their doors this week...

Tip: Be sure to check hours before you go since they're sometimes limited. If you want to actually sit down to eat and have more than one in tow, make a reservation.

golden bridge yoga

My first experience with yoga was a kundalini class with Gurmukh (of celeb pre-natal yoga fame) about 7 years ago at the original Golden Bridge on 3rd St.

The new location in Hollywood is Gurmukh's vision of creating community realized - having evolved beyond just another yoga studio. Despite the new location's walking distance from my office, it's taken me nearly a year to make my way over, but I was glad I finally did.

With the inclusion of a natural food stop (salad bar by the pound, mung beans and rice, selected Indian food, numerous healthy sweets and a communal dining table), a large shopping area (with books, magazines, apparel, accessories and beauty items), a healing spa offering massage and a bevy of wellness services, as well as a wide variety of the yoga classes you'd expect (not just kundalini, but hatha and anusara), this really is a community center.

True to form, they host a number of events from music performances to book signings. All that considered, one of the best bets is still the old school kundalini yoga class with meditation taught by Gurmukh weekend mornings. After the class, yogi tea is served and nearly every weekend that's followed by Gurmukh opening her home to students for a communal vegetarian dinner. The experience is definitely worth the time.

Tip: Validated parking is available at the Arclight. Check out community classes in their online schedule for discounted rates at goldenbridgeyoga.com

6322 De Longpre Ave
Los Angeles, CA 90028
(323) 936-4172

living green (is a pain in the ass)

literally.

has anyone else tried the seventh generation toilet paper? in my ongoing effort to go green, i gave the roll a, um, test run, and was left thinking i could have cut out the middle man and wiped my bits with the recycled newspaper it's made from and it would have been a more pleasant experience than using recycled tp. seriously, the dispenser driven single sheet sand paper we had in elementary school was better than this!

i'm all about living green and i'm happy to stick with my environmentally friendly cleaners and products, even when it means sore arms from having to scrub a little bit harder, but when it comes to bog roll, just call me a consumerist pig.

oink. oink.